There comes a time when you finally realize that the girl standing right in front of you turns out to be the girl you’re meant to be with. That’s when you know when it’s love; however, knowing it and showing it are two very different things.
Once you know you’re in love, anything can happen. You can either ride the waves and let yourself go by showing that person how much you love them, or you can freeze up because you have no idea what comes next.
The process happens differently for everybody, but one thing is for sure: you don’t want to lose her. To keep her, however, you have to show her how you really feel. But how do you do that? Is there a pattern you need to follow? Are there rules? Read on to find out.
How do people typically express love for their partner?
To begin, let’s discuss general expressions of love. How you express your affection depends on how your relationship starts and whether you’re the type of person who follows traditional patterns in relationships. To give you a starting point, here are some examples:
#1 By giving gifts. It may seem like you’re buying love, but that’s not always the case. Long before dating became a complicated concept, men were tasked with giving their chosen mates gifts like meat for their home or a trophy from a hunt. As time went on, the concept of gift-giving remained intact, i.e. dowry, expensive gifts from suitors and paying for dates. Giving gifts is a way of showing that you’re willing to go above and beyond for the person you love.
#2 By doing crazy or excessive stunts. It’s hard to believe that one of the greatest fictional acts of love in the world ended up with two dead protagonists *I’m looking at you Shakespeare* but this actually used to happen. Men would engage in duels to win a woman’s heart. Some traveled long distances just to court a woman they’d only heard of. Some even resorted to kidnap – er, “eloping” just to be with their one true love.
The quest for love didn’t used to be as easy as using Tinder. It was a lot harder to do, but a lot easier to prove once you achieved your goal. Today, we’re still seeing the whole song and dance by people who run through airports or sing in front of huge crowds or hire huge crowds to dance for them. After all, the bigger the stunt, the bigger the payoff usually is.
#3 By working hard at your relationship long-term. Traditions in long-established cultures used to require men to spend years courting the girl of their dreams. It wasn’t like the process most people are used to, such as going on three dates or waiting until you feel a spark. Back then, you had to wait even if you had already fallen in love. These days, the wait is a little shorter, but the idea is still there: you need more time to prove you are serious about the relationship and prove that you can be trusted.
Luckily for you, these are not the only ways to show how much you love your girl. Whether or not you choose the methods mentioned above to show your love, you still have to stick to what’s really important: being open and honest about how you really feel.
How to express your love to your girl
We’ve gone over how love has been expressed traditionally—what about surefire ways to express love to the one you’re with now? These 12 methods are sure to demonstrate your adoration.
#1 Be as close as possible. Have you ever noticed that most people are adamant about spending time with their partners in person? Long distance relationships are called “the kiss of death” for a reason: because close proximity is intoxicating and promotes deeper connections. Spend more time with your girl in person and always keep yourself physically close by holding her hand or putting your arm around her.
#2 Touch her. It may sound like a weird way of showing how much you love a person, but it’s basically the most primal way of doing so. Aside from holding hands, you can also make your girl feel loved by hugging her constantly or by touching her face, shoulders, arms and back. It’s reassuring and shows her you’re not afraid to be intimate with her.
#3 Communicate. If you’re having difficulty expressing yourself through your actions, you can also express yourself using words. No need for poetic speeches or rom-com lines. Just tell your girl why you love her. Come prepared with a list if you are especially nervous.
#4 Spoil her. Sometimes, you need to go above and beyond just to show someone you care. We’re not asking you to drain your bank account. Just do something that requires a bit more effort than what your partner’s used to. You can save up for a huge date or even a gift that she’s been eyeing for a long time, or come up with an inexpensive, but extravagant picnic. Just make sure that you’re not forgetting more important expenses like bills, savings, and food costs.
#5 Notice the little things she does. Acknowledge the little things that your girlfriend does now and then. Maybe her nose twitches in an adorable way or she constantly checks to make sure you’re okay. Tell her you love those things about her. That way, she’ll know you love and notice the small things, too.
#6 Say thank you. Love isn’t just about telling your partner how your heart feels. It’s also about being there for her and appreciating her presence in your life. Be grateful for her love and show her by saying “Thank you.” Hearing that feels just as good as an “I love you.”
#7 Rescue her. When she’s feeling down or if she has a problem, prove that you care by doing your best to help her out. Even if it’s a simple need like her car running out of gas or getting a scratch when she trips, care for and rescue her.
#8 Do something she can do for herself. Your girlfriend is probably an amazing person who can give Wonder Woman a run for her money, but taking time to do something small—something she can do on her own—shows that you love and appreciate her. Run to the grocery to get her tampons when it’s almost time for her Aunt Flo to visit. Bring her coffee before she has to go to work. It doesn’t have to be a huge gesture. It just needs to be something that shows her you’re willing to help her with anything she needs.
#9 Protect her. Women don’t need to be protected, but in a relationship, you should protect each other. Do your part by being there for her when someone tries to hurt her. Whether it’s physical or emotional, do your best to defend her. If she feels like she doesn’t need you to fight her battles for her, just let her know you have her back and she’ll know that you’ll always be there for her.
#10 Live in her world. Don’t close yourself off to her life and interests. Spend time with her friends and family even when she’s not there. Watch her work some time, or spend a day with her doing her favorite hobby. Sharing your life is one of the keys to lasting happiness in a relationship, as it shows how much you care.
#11 Show her your world. Make sure she feels welcome to do the same thing for you. Introduce her to your friends and family. Tell her all about your interests and hobbies. Once she sees how much you want her to be a part of your life, she’ll be more than willing to immerse herself in your world as well.
#12 Say you love her with conviction. Mean it with all your heart because she’ll know if it’s not true. If you feel an overwhelming rush of affection towards her, say it without any doubt or hesitation.
Showing love is pretty easy once you get the hang of it. Although it may seem daunting at first, with a little time and practice, you’ll be a pro at showing *and telling* your girl how much she means to you. Just realize that there’s no point in holding back once you feel it in your heart that you’re in love.
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